Nick

I had a dream last night. And it was a funky dream. With many an odd twist and turn. I shall tell you about it:

I was having some sort of party because my next door neighbor had just died. And so I invited Sora, Dakota, Becky, and some random people. Well everyone was inside my house except Sora and I. We were in the driveway talking about hentai. At that time I noticed my neighbor's car had been moved. And it hadn't been moved for years. So I dashed over there and found a box. I opened the box and found salsa and a small bowl...Well I threw that stuff away and went back inside my house. Well then the sky got darker and I heard Sora and Becky scream. So I dash into my garage and they are gone. So I grab a hoe(XD The garden tool!) and Dakota grabs a shovel with a sharpened end(Almost like a shovel sword!) and we run outside. Well there are 2 random people and my friend Alex standing there. The 2 random guys are holding shovels and Alex has a gun. Well Dakota and I start fighting with the 2 guys and Alex stands a watches. Well I smack my guy in the face with my hoe and he doesn't even flinch. And Dakota jumps in the air and slams his shovel on his guys head. And his guy barely moves at all. So our fighting continues this way. And Dakota and I were kicking ass! Well then I see that Alex is pointing his gun at me. And I'm trying to fight off my guy while dodging bullets. Well I lose my concentration and get hit in the head with a shovel. So I'm on the ground trying to get up when Alex puts 5 slugs into me and I'm dead but I can still breathe and see what's going on. So Alex and the guy I was fighting throw my corpse onto my roof. Well they didn't do a good job so I was hanging off of my roof. And Dakota is fighting right below me. So I fall and land on Dakota and he gets killed. X_X Well they throw Dakota's body onto the roof and can't lift me(;-;). So then they go into the house and slaughter the rest of my guests. Well a little while after that I'm looking at Dakota's hair(Which is blue) as it waves and dances...Yesh....Well then I see Dakota get up and he glares down at me. And I look into the house and all my guests are alive but they're all glaring at me. So they leave and I plead with Dakota not to leave but he spits on me and walks away. So then I'm laying there crying and I find that my wounds have closed up and I can move. So I get up and walk into my house. I walk up to my room and go over to my bed(Which is in a pit about 6 feet deep). I look down and I see Dakota and DD making out(They're under a blanket so who knows what else they could be doing). So I dive down there and start making out with DD and Dakota says something about their iPod's not having screens so they will lose all their data. And DD is trying to push me off of her so Dakota punches me and pushes me off of her. So I jump out of the pit and fly into the sunset.

THE END

>.> Damn you Dakota....Damn you

I know that I'm in love again. And I hate it. I can't muster up the bravery to tell her how I truly feel about her. I long to kiss her. To hold her. But being myself, I can't. My fear of being rejected keeps me from taking action and asking her out. I need to know how she feels about me before I ask her. It is the worst feeling in the world when you ask someone out and are rejected. And it makes it worse when they start to avoid you because you like them and they don't want you to like them anymore. *Cough*Desireedidthat*Cough*

This song is really sad and I love it.

I keep playing it over and over and I can't seem to stop. I guess I've fooled myself into thinking that if I stop the song then my emotions will catch up to me and I might do something stupid. It seems that when I'm listening to music that I don't do a lot of the stupid things that I might normally do. A couple of years ago when I was pretty big into porn I would listen to music to keep myself from looking at that shit. And it worked. I eventually stopped. And I felt great.

But happiness isn't meant to last. And it sucks. Take my family for example. in 7th grade things were great. I was happy with my family and we hardly fought but then when I got expelled we kind of stopped going to church. And then the fighting started. It would be a small argument over something pointless. And then it would escelate to something huge. And I would get pissed and try to leave the house. and my mom would assume that I was going to run away so she threatened to send me to my dad's if I didn't come back into the house. I always came back. I hate my dad. He is such an asshole and a liar.

He will yell at us about our grades. We will be getting a C in one class and A's in all the others and he can't focus on the A's and he'll chew us out about the C. And then he told us that he wasn't going to talk to us about it anymore because he thought we were going to fix it. And when we didn't he'd start yelling again. Hypocryte...And then he promised that if we got a B+ average for a year that he'd buy us a car. Well I get a D in P.E. and a F in math for ONE QUARTER and I already lose my car. And my mom wonders why I want to live with her instead of living with my dad.

Answer: Because I hate him

Dang...Why can't I just tell people how I feel? Makes me feel worthless and weak when I can't do something that I really want to do. Maybe I am just weak. And I need to get stronger. Emotionally and pysichally. So that I can protect my friends. I hate when people mess with them. I can stand them messing with me but I will immediatly get ready for a fight when they say one thing about my friends.

Or my brother. He's special ed and a horrible fighter. He pisses me off on a daily basis and always tells me that I'm fat and can't do anything. But when people talk trash about him I immediatly Yell at them. I don't owe him anything but he's family. And I can't abandon family. That isn't good.

LiveJournal feels good....I can tell people how I feel and if I don't want anyone to know what's going on then I just set the thing to private. And I like that. That way I can just release everything that I keep held inside. And that releaves all of this stress. So does fighting but I can't do that and not get in trouble.

I feel better now than when I started this entry.

I'll give you guys a list of what I get for Christmas tomorrow. For those of you who still use lj...

Merry Christmas

Nick

Yes mortals. Nicku-kun has returned from the depths of heeeeeeeeeeell. He's here to cause destruction and dooooooooom. Through the process of making blooooooooooogs.

"OMG! HOW SISISTER!"

"INDEED MORTAL! NOW DIE"

*DIES*

XD MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA

Well now that I'm back it seems that everyone else has left. Sora told me she shut her lj down and idk about Keica. I don't talk to Keica much. Makes me sad...She's really hyper ans such online but then I see her at school and she's like "...oh.....hi nick..."

O____O

WHAT DO YOU MEAN "hi nick?"

WHERE ARE THE CAPITAL LETTERS? WHERE IS DA LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!?!?!?!







Love is a lie.....


JK!


Because I can't say that. Because I'm pretty sure I'M in love.



I'm like 90% sure but I need that last 10% to make up it's mind before I tell y'all who it is.


Most of you know anyways....>.>;;;

I'll type more later.


Hope you guys come back to read my stuff!

Or else I'll be whining to nobody!


And when I whine to nobody bads stuff happens....


BAAAAAAAAAD STUFF



Like, exploding baby bad!

~Nicku

P.S. I get to open presents on Sunday because my dad won't see me on Christmas. I'll tell you guys what I got.

I got hit in the face with a frisbee. X_X

I am a moron. I don't know what I have until it's gone. Kind of like with my friends. I blew up over nothing and now they all hate me. And I'm sorry. Because I love them all and I don't want to lose them. And why I exploded was one of the stupidest reasons in the world. So Nick Burgess fooled me and nobody told me. I shouldn't have been so pissed off. Or atleast not at everyone who didn't tell me. And Keica, I'm esspecially sorry to you. All you did was make the page. You wanted to tell me the whole time. Just like everyone else. But I'm such an asshole and so blind that I could'nt see that. But now I see. I'm not mad at any of you. If andything I should just have been ticked at Nick. It was his idea. You guys just went along with it. God. This was nothing. I hate myself now. FUCK! I explode over nothing and it's going to happen all through my life. I don't deserve friends like you guys! All I'm going to do is mess up again and tick everyone off and fuck up their lives again. Like today. Keica I really hope you aren't dead. I want to talk to all of you. I don't want to be alone. I don't want to have this anger. I want to be a perfect friend to all of you. I hate it when i make ssomeone cry or hurt someone. Hang on....Can't see what I'm typing.*wipes eyes* Ok. I'm sorry guys.  I love all of you and don't want any of you to die. Esspecially you Keica. Who else could I tell all my secrets and trust you entirely? Answer: Nobody. You are my best friend. And so are you Dakota. I love all of you...And I want you all to know that I'd gladly take a bullet for all of you. No matter what I say or do to you I want you guys to remember that I love you all with all my heart and soul. I don't want any more pain in this world. I'm sure some of you might still be really pissed about this and that you're cursig my name as your reading this and that's ok. just as long as you forgive me somewhere along the line. I can't live without my friends. You guys are the reason I go to school. I ahte it and the only reason I get up in the mornings is to be with you guys. And Dakota. I don't know why I was so angry on Maple. Or when we we're walking home. I just kind of brought up that subject and wouldn't let it go and that was stupid. We we're having so much fun until I had to go ans fuck it all up by bringing up the whole "Amandalicious" thing. Who cares? So Nick Burgess is gay. Ok. Don't hate me! And Dakota, We need to get more XS and sink the cans. Because that was fun and I'll remember that for the rest of my life. We had so much fun today. And I hat myself for going and fucking it all up. So I want all of you to know I love you and DON'T want any of you dead. No matter what I said I DON'T hate all of you. I don't hate any of you. I might get pissed off at one of you from time to time but just give me some space and I'll calm down and realize that I can't live without you. Because I love all of you. With all my heart. And I'd gladly take a bullet for you guys. I'm positve that I'm repeating myself but I can't see the screen again. Dammit...I hate it when I cry. It makes me look so weak. But it's only after I'm done crying that I act human. Otherwise I can be a cold, heartless, son of a bitch who needs to go slit his wrists so nobody will be tormented by him anymore. I love all of you.

Nick

Fuck. I believe I've bitched to all of you about her before at one point or another. Well anyways I found out who it is today. Nick Burgess. The little fuck. And the worst part is that ALL of my friends knew. I was the only moron who couldn't figure it out. >_> God. I'm such a moron. Can't believe that I couldn't figure it out from the very begining. Rawr. The only way I would have figured it out was after homecoming. Burgess was gonna tell me. And then I would have spent the whole time at homecoming looking for this chick who doesn't even exist. Then I'd be all depressed cause I got stood up and I'd feel like they didn't actually love me and she didn't want to talk to me. So then my night would be ruined. It's better for Burgess that I found out now though. 'Cause if I had found out after homecoming and he said it to my face I would have beat the crap out of him. And no, I'm not just saying that to sound tough. I was sooooooooooo pissed yesterday. And desiree can vouch for that. And yes keica, she WAS the only one I was gonna talk to tomorrow. But now, I'm not talking to anyone. And no I wasn't gonna only talk to her because I like her. It's because she was the one who told me. Because she knows how it feels to go crazy over this kind of thing. Because of me. And dakota, if you're reading this, HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME? I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK?!?!? I THOUGH YOU WE'RE MY "BEST FRIEND" AND YES KEICA, IT WAS A PRANK. BUT IT WASN'T FUNNY. YOU'D TELL ME ON MONDAY, BUT ALL WEEKEND I'D BE DEPRESSED AND SHIT. SO WHATEVER. YEAH. IM AN ASSHOLE. FUCK YOU ALL!

Bleagh love sucks. I'm not loveable ;_;

Wait And Bleed
I've felt the hate rise up in me...
Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves...
I wander out where you can't see...
Inside my shell, I wait and bleed...

Goodbye!

I wipe it off on tile, the light is brighter this time
Everything is 3D blasphemy
My eyes are red and gold, the hair is standing straight up
This is not the way I pictured me
I CAN'T CONTROL MY SHAKES!
How the hell did I get here?
Something about this, so very wrong...
I have to laugh out loud, I wish I didn't like this
Is it a dream or a memory?

GET OUTTA MY HEAD CUZ I DON'T NEED THIS!
Why I didn't I see this?
I'm a victim - Manchurian Candidate
I - HAVE - SINNED - BY - JUST
Makin' my mind up and takin' your breath away

GOODBYE!

You haven't learned a thing
I haven't changed a thing
My flesh was in my bones
The pain was always free

I've felt the hate rise up in me...
Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves...
I wander out where you can't see...
Inside my shell, I wait and bleed...

AND IT WAITS FOR YOU!

Ha ha. I can't cut myself EVEN IF I TRY! omg what a wimp I am! I didn't eve break the skin and I'm like "ow..." HA HA HA! NOW NONE OF YOU WILL EVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT ME BEING A CUTTER! CAUSE IM SUCH A WIMP THAT I COULDNT EVEN CUT IF I WANTED TO! ME AND KEICA HAD LOTS OF FUN TODAY. WE GOT NICK IN TROUBLE CAUSE HE WAS ONLY SUPPOSED TO BE GONE FOR 20 MIN BUT WE WERE GONA FOR ABOUT 1 HR A 30 MIN!~ OMG WE SUCK! WELL I DO ATLEAST. AND YES I KNOW IM WRITING THIS ALL IN CAPS. AND IN MY MIND I HEAR MY OWN VOICE READING THIS ALL LIKE IM HAPPY. BUT IF YOU LOOK AT MY FACE IM MISERABLE! HA HA HA HA HA~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I MUST BE EMO~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I DONT JUMP AROUND WHEN I GO TO SHOWS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~AND SONGS ABOUT GETTING DUMPED GIVE ME AN ERECTION(<- FAV. LINE)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~AHHHH SQUIGGLEYS, YOURE MY ONLY FRIEND AT THE MOMENT. CAUSE I CANT GET ON MYSPACE AND I CANT GET ON MSN. I CANT EVEN GET THE SONG I WANTED OFF OF MYSPACE. THATS HOW BAD I SUCK!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I GOT A DOO RAG~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~HOMIE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~YEAH THIS IS POINTLESS WHY ARE YOU EVEN READING THIS?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
g2g get homies off of dakotas myspace


~Wimp child~

Well I was pissed today and i think you could all see that from my previous update. Well I'm better now. so you can stop hidng. and leave me comments >_>. any ways. i got pissed cause my cd player sucked all the life out of my batteries and i had only listened to it for like 4 hours. my old on would last about a week on one new set of batteries. so....i took a hammer to it. ANGER MANAGEMENT AT ITS BEST MOTHA FUCKAS! XD yay. and it was fun smashing something. so i took my brothers cd player cause he doesnt use it. but now he wants it back cause i have it. >_> just like a little kid. doesnt want something until someone else has it. lame lame LAME. and anyways it was MY old cd player. the hold button broke off so i switche my old cd player with his brand new cd player. he didnt notice. he never used it since last christmas. i went through 2 cd players and countless numbers of headphones. and then i went to my other brother to ask for batteries and he got all high and mighty on me after i grabbed them "if you want your batteries to last longer, turn own your music" turn down your face! it hurts to look at it and i hate you! wicked lame burn! HA HA HA. somebody leave me a comment

Porkchop

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. My mom is a bitch. plain and simple. Yeah i was at dakota's house. Sorry i didnt tell you! so she calls and is slightly ticked and askes me why im over there. and i told her that i was letting dakota burn some of my cds. and so shes like ok. so then like 15 min later she calls back and is REALLY pissed cause i wasnt home. and it was because iTunes wasnt going very fast and we were burning MY cd. and shes all like " I WANTED YOU HOME 15 MINUTES AGO! WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?" "im still at dakotas house. his cd burning thing is going slow" "I WANT YOU HOME NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!" shut up bitch. ill get home when im good and ready. i mean jeez. eddie dhould have told you where i was going. why didnt he? cause he wanted me to get in trouble for blaming him for stealing my light that cost me like $20! fricken loser...he knows i know he has it but he wont admit it. and he hid it good. so i cant find it. so i just lost my zippo. fuck. which pisses me off. damn! today has just sucked! desiree is being a bitch. again. keica isnt around so i cant talk to her. sora is like my only friend who ever gets online. im way behind dakota on maple story. IT SUCKS! cause then he kicks ass and im all like hitting ones and shit. bleagh. and desiree, when shes not dissing me or slapping me or punching me or biting me or whatever, shes leading me on. but she doesnt like me. shes just a slut!damn. i should say that about her. but shell go up to random strangers and start poking them and talking to them. its weird but funny at the same time. and shes pissing off keica cause shes stealing gabe from her. and then i tell desiree that and then 5 minutes later " why is keica mad at me?" WTF?!?1 I JUST TOLD YOUz! YOUR GETTING AS BAD AS THE FUCKIN STANLEY TWINS! >_< LIFE SUCKS! and im too much of a pussy to tell the girl i like that i like her. so i talk to her and im tormented by her cause i like her but i cant tell her. AND EVERYONE DITCHES ME AND DOESNT LISTEN TO ME! at lunch im trying to listen to my crappy cd player with no anti skip and then someone hit the table and it skips and i say "hey guys, dont hit the table cause my cd player skips" so a few minutes later a annonymous person hits the table. cd player skips. "guys. plz stop hitting the table" *bump* "dammit stop it whoevers doing that!" *bumpbumpbumpbumpbump* "DAMMIT DO I HAVE TO KICK SOMEONES ASS?!?!?" *silence* "thats what i though you faggots" *bump* and i was fast enought to see who it was. fuckin arron johnson. go have your hissy fits and leave me alone. "omg. get a life arron" after is ay that everyone leaves. except for the girl i like. she stays there to listen to ICP with me. which was cool. cause she lies them now. i think she likes them. and the rst of the day goes by without inccident. except for NOAH CAME BACK TO FUCKIN SCHOOL! YEAH YEAH! but hes only there for 5th and 6th period. otherwise hes online at home taking internet classes. fucking shcool fucked up his schedule. and i have no classes with him. which sucks the big ones. and i get on the bus. and turn up my music cause i just got the cd. and desiree sits next to me. and she starts listening to dakotas iPod. and noah and the other guys keep calling me and talking to me but i cant hear them cause i m looking out the window instead of at them. and then when we get to the first stop desiree sits with dakota. cause she wants to listen to his music. and im so pathetic that im felt betrayed and abandoned. then we get to my house and i show off my kitten. and everyone loves her. and my fat cat, mojo. fatty cat. he sucks. then we go to dakotas. and desiree has to leave. and when she does she hugs dakota and just says bye to me. fuckin bitch. who needs you? ....i did....for a long time. but not anymore. dammit. dakota has a gf and hes getting more hugs then i am. X_X im getting lots of hugs from guys. and im hugging lots of guys. FUCK AM I GAY?!?!?!? damn i hope not. i dont wanna be fair game for anthoney. that would suck. cause hes annoying. and girly. he needs to become a man. atleast his voice has become deeper instead of his old girly voice he had. enough bitching. time for maple story. time to get dissed by everyone on the game because of my name. LoNERstoNER. "what does a stoner do?" "smoke pot moron" "they get high." "thats what i said" " no you said they smoke pot. i said they get high" "fucking moron theyre the same thing" and they defame me cause i cuss at them. "fuck you noob. i dont care about fame!"

~Porkchop~

RAWR. sora flipped me off. she doesnt care. keica didnt say anthing like "sora!" "or dont flip him off!" but cause she dont care. nobody cares! this whole world sucks! teh rawr. time to rant.


this little piggy went to the market. this little piggy stayed home. this little piggy had tons of whores at his house but didnt get laid. and this little piggy got AIDS. and this little piggy cried "omgomgomg" all the way home cause a giant spider had bit off his left ear.

another nursery rhyme


little miss muffet sat on some random guys lap. and he got a boner and......nvm next rhyme



(imagine a arnold swartinigger voice) jack be nimble, jack be quick, jack jump over the dynamite stick, THEN IT BLEW UP! the end. now if you make fun of me I BLOW YOU UP!


ok enough of those. im tired. im hungry, my pants are too tight. im taling too much. im talking too little.... the list goes on and on. my gf left me. well no she didnt. wait! yes she did. she logged off. never to return. i am the scum of society. death to me. and all the bubblde gum in the world. cause i cant have any. damn braces. they make me brush my teeth like crazy and i cant even have lots of the food i love. cause itll damage my braces or something along those lines. speaking of braces....i broke one of my brackets off of them. i want eating a jaw breaker and i bit down and broke off a bracket. good thing i wasnt using that one. it didnt even have wire going through it. AND NOW SORA WONT GLOMP ME! SHE ALWAYS GLOMPS ME! oh nvm. she glomped me. yay LOVE! whatever. now you guys can read this and laughor get kreeped out cause im SUCH A FREAK! bye bye guys

"Nobody’s Listening"

Yo, peep the style and the kids checking for it
The number one question is how could you ignore it
We drop right back in the cut over basement tracks
With raps that got you backing this up like
Rewind that we're just rolling with the rhythm
Rise from the ashes of stylistic division
With these non-stop lyrics of life living
Not to be forgotten but still unforgiven
But in the meantime there are those who wanna talk this and that
So I suppose that it gets to a point where feelings gotta get hurt
And get dirty with the people spreading the dirt

it goes

[Chorus]
(Tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)
(Called to you so clearly but you don’t want to hear me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
handfull of anger, held in my chest
And everything left’s a waste of time
I hate my rhymes, but hate everyone else’s more
I’m riding on the back of this pressure
Guessing that it’s better I can’t keep myself together
Because all of this stress gave me something to write on
The pain gave me something I could set my sights on
Never forget the blood sweat and tears
The uphill struggle over years the fear and
Trash talking and the people it was to
And the people that started it just like you

[Chorus]
(Tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)
(Called to you so clearly but you don’t want to hear me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
handfull of anger, held in my chest
Uphill struggle
Blood sweat and tears
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear

Heart full of pain, head full of stress
handfull of anger, held in my chest
Uphill struggle
Blood sweat and tears
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear

Heart full of pain

[Chorus]
(Tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)
(Called to you so clearly but you don’t want to hear me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
(Nobody’s listening)
handfull of anger, held in my chest
(Nobody’s listening)
Uphill struggle
Blood sweat and tears
(Nobody’s listening)
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear
(Nobody’s listening)

Coming at you from every side

hey guys, sorry i havent been on too much lately. been really busy.


"Next Contestant"

I judge by what she's wearing
Just how many heads I'm tearing
Off of assholes coming on to her
Each night seems like it's getting worse
And I wish she'd take the night off
So I don't have to fight off
Every asshole coming on to her
It happens every night she works
They'll go and ask the DJ
Find out just what would she say
If they all tried coming on to her
Don't they know it's never going to work
They think they'll get inside her
With every drink they buy her
As they all try coming on to her
This time somebody's getting hurt

Here comes the next contestant

[CHORUS]
Is that your hand on my girlfriend?
Is that your hand?
I wish you'd do it again
I'll watch you leave here limping
I wish you'd do it again
I'll watch you leave here limping
There goes the next contestant

I even fear the ladies
They're cool but twice as crazy
Just as bad for coming on to her
Don't they know it's never going to work
Each time she bats an eyelash
Somebody's grabbing her ass
Everyone keeps coming on to her
This time somebody's getting hurt

Here comes the next contestant

[CHORUS]

I'm hating what she's wearing
Everybody here keeps staring
Can't wait 'til they get what they deserve
This time somebody's getting hurt

Here comes the next contestant

[CHORUS]
I wish you'd do it again
Each night seems like it's getting worse
I wish you'd do it again
This time somebody's getting hurt

There goes the next contestant

Depressed. Dont know why. I think its becase of this song and all the crap thats happened lately. Whatever. Who cares?
"Blurry"

Everything's so blurry
and everyone's so fake
and everybody's empty
and everything is so messed up
pre-occupied without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl

You could be my someone
you could be my scene
you know that i'll protect you
from all of the obscene
I wonder what you're doing
imagine where you are
there's oceans in between us
but that's not very far

Can you take it all away
can you take it all away
well ya shoved it in my face
this pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away
can you take it all away
well ya shoved it my face

Everyone is changing
there's noone left that's real
to make up your own ending
and let me know just how you feel
cause I am lost without you
I cannot live at all
my whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl

You could be my someone
you could be my scene
you know that i will save you
from all of the unclean
I wonder what you're doing
I wonder where you are
There's oceans in between us
but that's not very far

[Chorus]

Nobody told me what you thought
nobody told me what to say
everyone showed you where to turn
told you when to runaway
nobody told you where to hide
nobody told you what to say
everyone showed you where to turn
showed you when to runaway

[Chorus]

This pain you gave to me

You take it all
You take it all away...
This pain you gave to me
You take it all away
This pain you gave to me
Take it all away
This pain you gave to me

ok sorry guys. i finally caved and am adding song lyrics. sorry again.this is one of the few rap songs i like.

"Nobody’s Listening"

Yo, peep the style and the kids checking for it
The number one question is how could you ignore it
We drop right back in the cut over basement tracks
With raps that got you backing this up like
Rewind that we're just rolling with the rhythm
Rise from the ashes of stylistic division
With these non-stop lyrics of life living
Not to be forgotten but still unforgiven
But in the meantime there are those who wanna talk this and that
So I suppose that it gets to a point where feelings gotta get hurt
And get dirty with the people spreading the dirt

it goes

[Chorus]
(Tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)
(Called to you so clearly but you don’t want to hear me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
handfull of anger, held in my chest
And everything left’s a waste of time
I hate my rhymes, but hate everyone else’s more
I’m riding on the back of this pressure
Guessing that it’s better I can’t keep myself together
Because all of this stress gave me something to write on
The pain gave me something I could set my sights on
Never forget the blood sweat and tears
The uphill struggle over years the fear and
Trash talking and the people it was to
And the people that started it just like you

[Chorus]
(Tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)
(Called to you so clearly but you don’t want to hear me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
handfull of anger, held in my chest
Uphill struggle
Blood sweat and tears
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear

Heart full of pain, head full of stress
handfull of anger, held in my chest
Uphill struggle
Blood sweat and tears
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear

Heart full of pain

[Chorus]
(Tried to give you warning but everyone ignores me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)
(Called to you so clearly but you don’t want to hear me)
Told you everything loud and clear
(But nobody’s listening)

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
(Nobody’s listening)
handfull of anger, held in my chest
(Nobody’s listening)
Uphill struggle
Blood sweat and tears
(Nobody’s listening)
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear
(Nobody’s listening)

Coming at you from every side

dont ask me who hubert cumberdale is. i guess he could be the "real" friend who replaces my lost friends keica. sure that works... but anywaysthis is my 21st update!! *fireowrks go off and catch hubert on fire* well...that wasnt supposed to happen...if keica decides she wants to be friends with me then shell probably say so and if she doenst wanna be firneds then i guess she wont say anything to me.and if she isnt gonna be my firned anymore then shell probably convince desiree to hate me too.(not that we were on friendly terms before) so i guess all of the friends i have now are guys. exceot for trevor. im not too sure about him...jk ^^ well idk why im happy but i am. ive lost 2 friends this week and im still happy. as long as alex stops sending me hate mail ill be fine. as long as keica doesnt send me hate mail ill be fine. as soon as i get a shower ill be fine. as soon as i stop typing "as soon" stuff ill be fine. geez that got annoying after the 2nd time. but im still confused what i said to make keica hate me. did i call her fat? i didnt think i did. i didnt make fun of her religion. i didnt call any of her friends names... i didnt do anything but insult myself a few times. i guess after hearing that a few times id go crazy and hate me too. whatever. but if desi and keica arent my friends then what am i gonna do about "confusion of pain and love 3"? am i gonna give the series to them incomplete? am i gonna finish it? am i gonna stop asking questions? answer: probably not!! well yesterday i was playing halo online and i killed someone named "Lynx" so im wondering if amanda plays halo... if she does she might kill me for running her over and if its not...someone is stealing her identity!!! or just her name... whichever..i am a pimp...well maybe not...im more like the hoe who gets slapped around...whatever...it dont matter...i like being a hoe...even thogh i dont get many customers...and the ones i do get arent satisfied at the end..im not even a hoe...why do i keep putting in so many periods? geez i can go on and on about some of the stupidest stuff! idk why but i can never stop either. i cant believe i lost 2 firneds this week alone. thats like an all time low for me!! i usually lose a friend and then get them back the next day. keica wont talk to me and alex wont stop whining about getting kicked so hes not gonna forgive me. weird...i dont care about losing alex but keica....she was the only person who listened to me when i was crying or whining. she was the only one who cared... she was the only one who put up with me. and i lost her...crap...not cool...my good mood is ruined... AND SHE WAS THE ONE WHO GOT ME THIS CUTE LITTLE HAMSTER PERSON!!! I MISS KEICA!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!! *sniffle sniffle* im gonna go take a shower....i feel gross...

~loner stoner boner man~

well i was talking to keica today on Yahoo Instant Messager and i giess i had done or said something to piss her off. idk what i did or said but she was pissed. so then i told her dakota called me pathetic. and she was like "you are!" then she went on saying that i wanted people to call me fat and shtuff like that. idk idk idk... she was really pissy today and it didnt seem like she was herself today. it was weird. she typed slower. typed less. and was more aggressive. maybe it was a secret angent who secretly diguised themself as keica! then they got onto YIM to make keica seem like a bad person!! but i doubt it. she porbably is mad at me for being friends with dakota. she hates him. just because he beats up anthony. is really rude to everyone, and does lots of other shit. sheesh all of the friends that i have hate each other. so now i have 2 people who hate me and they used to like me. alex and keica. i dont care if alex hates me as long as he stops talking to me and going on and on about getting kicked in the back when hes on the ground. geez man. if i was him id kick me back and be done with it. but no. he has to ick me then keep rubbing it in my face. oy vey. things these days are really crazy. my friends hate me and im not happy with some of them. is it pressure? or are they just tired of listening to me talk? and how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?!?!? ive always wanted to say that. and ive always wanted to know the answer. how many licks does it take? over 300 or i liitle less than 200? THE WORLD MAY NEVER KNOW! lol i miss the days back when cartoons were more detailed and the commercials were worth watching. now the shows look like a 4 year old kid made em and the commercials are people stnading around blinking. and breathing. whoopee. as if we dont do enough of that these day!!! i like the cartoons that are detailed and have weird inventions. like on ed,edd, and eddy. theyre always trying to earn money to get JAWBREAKERS!!!! i like jawbreakers too. oh well. maybe keica will tell me why she hates me and maybe she wont. and maybe shell update her lj.

~nick~

well today at school it was kinda funny. at lunch we went outside ad our mortal enemy came outside to palay with us. i couldnt see cause keica had my glasses. but he came outside and i was talkin to my friend and he said "nick! behind you!" and i turned around just in time to get knocked over by clinton. all i could see was a huge blur of red, greasy hair. then his friend came out and clinton tackled him. when clinton tackled him his stuff went everywhere. including his cookies. so i grabbed them and chucked them at clinton. i hit him in the ear and it was already cold out. he was all pissed and i started running. i couldnt outrun him so i stopped and he got 2 inches away from my face (he wanted to make out with me again) and he was like "that shit hurt!" he was almost crying about it! his eyes were all read and he kept sniffing. hes such a loser... but i was like "dude...your gonna get suspened over getting hit with cookies?" and he was like "is worth it!" and i was like "i was aiming for your back. i didnt mean to hit your head" but i was thinking "but im glad i did". so he walked away. then my friend jumped on his back and clinton tried to shake him off but he couldnt. and so he grabbed mt frineds leg and brou8ght him up to his chest. i yelled "clinton! are you trying to suck his dick?" and clinton was like "ewww! hell no!" and he dropped him. then clinton went on and on about how he could pick any of us up and s he was like "let me pick you up nick" and i was like "im not gonna let you suck my dick!" and stood there. then he got behind me and grabbed my knees and flipped me onto my face. i got really pissed but when i was chasing him my friend nailed him in the balls with my tupaware. idk if i want to use that thing any more. but it was a good day^^ until i found out that desi and fire-crotch are friends >:o

~nick~

ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok OK
dudes im gonna tell you a story. its a wonderful story. its about death and dying. wonderfull isnt it? well my dad and his girlfreind were driving up to canada (eh?) for a ski trip when al of a sudden this suicidal deer jumped out in front of them and screamed "FOR ALLA!!!" he had a bomb strappeed to his chest and was about to detonate the bobmb when he was splattered by my dad's suberban. he didnt stand a chance. my dad had just covered a huge hill so he was going downhill, increasing his speed. and he was already going 60 MPH. plus the deer was like one eigtteenth the size of the suberban. well needless to say the deer went flyinh...in all directions. my dad ended up breaking both of the right legs completely off. no blood anywhere. just flyinh deer parts. but the sucidal deer ended up smashing my dads radiator and that flew back into the transmission and so that blew up and tranmission fluid went all over the car. the suberban died. but the two good parts of this were 1) the suicidal deer died because when he landed his bimb went off and 2) my dad didnt spill a drop of his beer. HOORAY FOR BEER! but so he had to get it towed all the way back to our house. so in a couple of hours we dissmembered the front end of our suberban and we will put the new front end on it soetime in the month. idsk when. idk how. idk if i want to do it. well actually i do want to do it. it was fun srewing and unscrewing bolts and nuts. for all of you people who are taking this and laughing at it....you are perverts. but it actually was a lot of fun. and i didnt even think we were out there fir 3 hours even though we were. it seemed more like we were only out there for an hour. but i liked it. i inscrewed lots of stuff. and i got really greasy. so when we came back inside i washed my hands and i went onto lj to tell you all about this. this was one of the few times i enjoyed doing something with my dad. CRAZY HUH?!?!?

~Nick~